It lets you screen out the losers who can’t handle a woman like you.
You do need to come out about your status before you have oral, anal, or vaginal sex, not for their safety as much as yours. Each of those states has reported proceedings in which an HIV-positive person has been arrested and/or prosecuted for consensual sex, biting, or spitting, and in some states even a hand job can be a risky act if you haven’t told your sexual partner your status.
According to the Center for HIV Law and Policy, 36 states and two U. A report from the group documents 80 prosecutions in a recent two-year period, such as that of an HIV-positive Iowa man who had used a condom (he had to register as a sex offender and is not allowed unsupervised contact with young children, including his nieces and nephews) and a Georgia woman who was sentenced to eight years in prison for failing to disclose her HIV-positive status, even though two witnesses told jurors that her sexual partner was aware of her diagnosis.
Look, you don’t have to tell anyone about your HIV status until you’re ready emotionally or are about to engage in behavior that could put someone at risk (such as sex). Some women like to come out casually between dinner and dessert, while others mark it as a serious conversation to be had after the first date but before things get serious. Yes, you have a disability, but living with HIV is like living with any other chronic disease.
What is important to remember is that you are not alone: You are one of the nearly 1.2 million Americans living with HIV, according to the latest data available from the U. While you can’t transmit diabetes or fibromyalgia to a sexual partner, there are incredibly effective ways to ensure that potential partners are never at risk of contracting HIV from you, including treatment as prevention and proper condom use.
Just remember, there’s no shame in having HIV and being honest with a prospective date about it.
Dating is tough in general, but being a woman who is HIV-positive presents a whole host of unique questions and issues.
We answer some of your most pressing relationship questions, from dating to marriage to babies.
Yes, there are a handful of dating sites that are for people with HIV or, in some cases, another sexually transmitted infection, like herpes or hepatitis.
HIVDating Online.com, Poz Match.com, and Positive all welcome women who are straight, gay, or bi.
Some sites, such as HIVNet.com, began as community sites in the ’90s and grew into dating sites as more members joined; that kind of start offers a sort of friendly, self-policing (no spam! Plenty of sites specific to other parts of your identity make disclosing your status easy.
It’s not uncommon to see profiles that begin with “I am HIV-positive” and go on to list the poster’s other interests, as they do on the pet-lovers personals site Love Me Love My Pets.com, or JDate.com, which is for Jewish singles.
Remember, though, there’s no reason you can’t use or She Wired or any other mainstream dating site.
This is a personal choice, really, but many women say that disclosing on a website is an easy way to take the fear of rejection out of meeting new potential dates.