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I was standing on a dirt path in a Russian country village, holding my boyfriend Anton’s torn, bloodstained T-shirt.All that could be heard in the darkness was my friends and I shouting his name, and the thuds and grunts of Anton wrestling with another guy.Only a few minutes ago, we’d been standing together drinking beer, when the other guy made the dubious and drunken decision to put his arm around me.

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But I’m not going to lie: Part of me was turned on.

Here was a guy protecting my honor, placing himself into bodily harm on my behalf.

It was what I had dreamt of all those years when I read of dueling pistols and men of great action and few words. ”Suddenly, I wished my women’s studies professor from Sarah Lawrence were there.

Make a bold move and go from a lusting lurker to a dating machine with these tips on how to meet gay men: Get out and meet people.

Gay men don't live in bars (well, most don't). Once you've identified your prospect, look for your window of opportunity. Watch a couple of hours of Discovery Channel and see how the patient tiger cruises the jungle before a kill.

There is queer opportunity in every place- if you're aware of your surroundings. In most cases (especially if alone), your prospect will do or say something that gives you the opportunity to strike up a conversation.Keep your eyes open for flirtatious looks, comments or gestures at the grocery store, laundry mat or book shop. Lurk in the frozen food aisle until he turns the corner. Or get in line behind him and laugh at the ridiculous magazine covers.Anything to get his attention and start a dialogue.I'm not suggesting you stalk the man or follow him home, only that you position yourself for optimal opportunity. Most gay novices don't fail at the approach, it's the continuation of dialogue that throws them for a loop. If the tiger misses his target on the first strike, he doesn't just say "Oh, well." He continues the hunt until he gets what he wants.If he laughs at a comment you make and then turns around, make another one. If the guy is truly not interested in you, he'll say something. When your window of opportunity closes, seal the deal by asking him for his phone number or out for coffee. Let him know that you're interested in talking to him further.As they say in sales, never be afraid to ask for the sale.