― Anonymous narcissist The Mayo Clinic research group defines narcissistic personality disorder as “a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration.
Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings.
A pathological narcissist loves to talk about himself, often in exaggerated and grandiose terms. She is also someone who’s likely to dominate a conversation. Common conversational topics for narcissists include accomplishments and achievements (the trophy complex), exciting and envy-worthy activities, excessive focus on personal issues and concerns, excessive focus on looks and materialism, and putting others down to show one’s own superiority. Charming and Romantic – But with a Catch Many narcissists can come across as alluring and attractive, especially during the initial stages of a relationship, when they’re trying to win you over. Like a master salesperson, they use charisma to get your attention, flattery to make you feel special, seduction (flirting, gifts, dinners, get-aways, sex, etc.) to lift you off your feet, and persuasion to get you to give them what they want. While there’s absolutely nothing wrong inherently with being charming, romantic, and a good lover, the narcissist crafts these traits in order to use others.
He or she is not really interested in you, but only what he wants to extract from you (often to fulfill an inner emptiness due to the inability to create true intimacy). Lack of Reliability and Follow Through Another way to spot a narcissist is to measure her or his actions against her words. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 52 No 6.
Many narcissists lack reliability and follow through.
This can range from regularly breaking appointments, to habitually falling through on promises and agreements.
The lack of dependability can be emotional as well - being there for you one minute and gone the next.
When you observe a pattern of inconsistency between what your partner says, versus what she or he actually does, you may be dealing with a narcissist. Instant Gratification Some narcissists, being highly self-centered and self-absorbed, expect instant gratification to fulfill their needs.
This may range from goading you to answer their texts or calls immediately, to pressuring you to do things their way (socially, interpersonally, and/or sexually). Sexual Narcissism and Infidelity in Early Marriage.